My Battle With Emotophobia

     I recently wrote about Emotophobia giving a small glimpse into my battle with this phobia. Now I will tell more about how it effects me personally.

     For as long as I remember I have been unusually afraid of throwing up. I don't just like it, I fear it. I feel the same fear of throwing up as I feel of clowns. I literally shake all over if I think I might vomit. When I was a child I would cry.

     Luckily I have not thrown up a lot in my adult years but that does not mean I have not been nauseated. Trust me I have. But, I will walk all night, I will eat soda crackers and well, if my stomach is the least bit icky feeling, I won't eat. I do eat a lot of jello if I am feeling nauseated and soda crackers work great too.

     I always worried about getting pregnant and the morning sickness part of it. When I was pregnant I was sicker than a dog but never threw up. I would fight it then too, shaking all over and sometimes even breaking out in a cold sweat. 

     After my kids were born I worried about them throwing up. Now spit-up is not the same and that never bothered me as much. But as my oldest son got older I worried. He never really got sick but when my second son came along I was introduced to child vomiting. He was one of those kids who would gag and lose his meal. He finally stopped that. I would have to turn away when he got sick and then I could clean it up.

     Both of my kids got stomach bugs a few times. It was a scary time for me. Thy did learn early that they woudl have to get sick in their bucket and then call for me, I would come and take care of things. If they missed the bucket and I had to clean up a mess I would literally throw all the bedding in the washer without getting anything off of it.  I would then worry for several days about getting the stomach bug myself. I would eat very bland food if I ate at all until I felt the danger had passed.

     My poor kids, when they would get sick, even if it was not a stomach bug, I would ask them constantly how they felt. I would worry that they might get sick to their stomachs and want to make sure it was not a stomach bug. I would not let them eat anything that might be upsetting to their stomach until I felt the fear of them vomiting was gone. Yes, I worried for days and nights that I might get sick too.

     I will not take any medicine that says it might cause nausea and when I had my knee surgery I would not take Morphine because it made my aunt throw up. 

    I cannot stand to see someone randomly barf on a TV show and will close my eyes if the character even acts sick. I also plug my ears when I am in the restroom and someone is getting sick. I just can't handle it. It is not like I just don't like it. I find it so hard to explain but it is a fear so deep inside me that I just want to run away or cry. 

     I even get a bit sick to my stomach when someone tells me they have been ill in a phone conversation. Yes even the social network posts people put up about being ill put me in a panic. Like I can catch it through cyber space. Irrational, yes, real panic, certainly. 

     For many years I wondered if I was the only one in the world who had this fear of vomiting, then I found out other people fear it too. My phobia is still there but at least now I know that I am not alone in it. 

To find out more about this phobia: Emotophobia

Emetophobia: The Irrational Fear of Throwing Up

     The TV character Monk has many phobias. He is afraid of frogs, heights, milk, and just about everything imaginable. It is comical to watch him deal with his phobias. However, many people suffer from phobias for real. It is not comical in reality. Some of the most common phobias are fear of spiders (arachnophobia), fear of heights (acrophobia), Fear of lightning and thunder (astraphobia), and fear of enclosed spaces (claustrophobia). Everyone is afraid of something. However, a phobia is the irrational fear of something. When a person has a phobia, they become very anxious. Sometimes they cannot even function normally when the thing they are afraid of is presented to them. A more uncommon phobia is emetophobia, fear of vomit. No one likes to vomit. However, those who have emetophobia can become physically ill because of their phobia.

     A person who has emetophobia has an irrational fear of other people vomiting or vomiting themselves. This person can be perfectly well, but will become ill when he or she hears that someone else has a stomachache. This person will actually avoid certain situations for fear of becoming ill. For example, a person with emetophobia will go out of his or her way to avoid people who have a stomach virus. A mom who has children who are ill will stress over the fact that her kids might throw up. People with emetophobia will fight the need to throw up themselves and sometimes become weak and shaky if he or she thinks that might happen.

     Those who suffer from emetophobia will usually be uncommonly aware of food sell by dates and will not eat or drink food that might be outdated. Some emetophobiacs are also germophobes because they do not want to get sick. They ask others how they feel quite frequently and worry if someone they know is ill. Emetophobiacs are extremely paranoid and can even become ill when talking to someone on the phone who is suffering from a stomach bug. If an emetophobiacs child actually is ill he or she will ask the child over and over again how he or she is. It is not just a concern. It is an obsession where the emetophobiac is concerned.

     If an emetophobiac is in the restroom while someone else is getting sick he or she will rush as fast as possible to leave the restroom and worry for days whether or not he or she is going to get sick too. For example, I have emetophobia and I used to use the public restroom at work because it is next to the kitchen, where I work. One time while I was in the restroom stall, one of the kids came in. She was sobbing. I asked her what was wrong. She said her tummy hurt. I said I was sorry as I quickly finished up. I left the room as fast as I could in a panic. Then I worried for several days that I might get ill, to the point of sleepless nights. I stopped using that that restroom. I walked down the hall to the staff restroom, which was much more inconvenient.

     Just as with any other fear or phobia there is a cause for emetophobia. However, it is not clearly defined. It could be that the person with emetophobia had a traumatic experience with someone being ill at one time or another. It could also be that a person has had a bad experience when he or she was ill. Possibly, there was a big trauma involved with being sick. In my own experience with the illness, I am not sure what caused me to be so afraid of throwing up. I have always been afraid of throwing up from as far back as I remember. I remember when I would get a stomachache as a child I would literally shake all over. My mom would comfort me and tell me it would be alright but I was still petrified. I still feel the same way and will walk around and do whatever it takes to prevent throwing up. I also still get shaky and panic when I feel nauseated.

     This phobia can have a strong effect on the quality of the sufferer's life. There is treatment however. A person can use self-help techniques or therapy. With self-help it is important that the emetophobiac faces his or her fear head on. That is not always easy. It is easiest for people to avoid things they are afraid of. With emetophobia a person using self help would need as much exposure to someone who is vomiting as possible. The fear will hopefully diminish with exposure. Eventually this might lead to the realization that there is really nothing to be afraid of. If self-help does not work then it is best to seek therapy.

     Next post I will write more about my experiences with this phobia.

References:

Segal, J. Phobias and Fears. www.helpguide.org

Veale, D. Emetophobia Specific Phobia of Vomiting www.overcominghealth.com